TAGGED!

The unit has been tagged. The circumstances leading to this tragic turn are under review and cannot be discussed until a finding has been reached, appealed, upheld, appealed, and overturned.

Six Random Things About "Jesse"

1. Regular readers of this blog recognize that while Jesse is a robot (the Jessbot 3000 v1.67) and is exactly the droid you're looking for, he could not be the last of the BSG final five because we've already exposed her. You probably didn't suspect him anyway cause he's not a very convincing model.

2. Jesse invented the internet to give Anonymous something to do while she's at work. Look how nicely that's working out for all of us.

3. He cannot fly, but if he could, he would soar overhead on these vibrant summer afternoons, bringing a message of peace and love throughout the land, and boy would his arms be tired.

4. He owns a car.

5. One time when Jesse went to the grocery store, they didn't have what he wanted, so he remembered something I once told him about how you can sometimes find a similar item.

6. It is surprisingly easy to reboot the Jessbot now that he's running Cougar OS.